Love is a trial and error process, in which my errors outnumber my successes.

I don’t say this from a place of self-deprecation, but more from a place of understanding. Because, love, to me, is a big and confusing mess and I still have no clue how to fall in love, never mind actually being in it.

I send one too many emails.

One too many text messages.

Make one too many phone calls.

And, it’s only because these rules, these boundaries, these YOU MUST BE CHASED guidelines don’t at all fit in with who I am. Because, let’s be real here, when I find someone who I connect with, male or female, I want to pursue them with such ferociousness that it probably makes them uncomfortable. If I find a woman that is awesome, I want to scream, “BE MY BFF!” from on top of my little mountain. And, if I find a guy that stops me in my tracks and grabs my attention, then I want to send cute emails and text messages and hang out with them and and AND et cetera.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Jan Mammey

But, all of this, more times than not, ends me up with tons of BFFs and a lot of guys who push me away at first only to try to pull me back in once my attention has moved on. Apparently, it’s all too much until it’s gone. And, then I just get annoyed. And I want to throw rocks at the boy. And, at this point, I’ve already moved onto another sick cycle of me acting like a total fool.

Except, you know what? I’m fine being the fool. It’s weeding the wrong people out and is getting me closer to finding someone who’s going to write me cute one-line emails that are so witty and amazing, I find it hard to concentrate on anything else but THEM.

Someone who will wake up before me, walk to Starbucks, buy me a Venti Vanilla Latte, bring it to me in bed, and finish it off with a simple kiss on the forehead.

Someone who will see that my attention is worthwhile in the moment, not just something they realize in retrospect, months after I’ve already moved on.

And, here’s how I see it: I either find someone who thinks it’s adorable that I’m so terribly impatient to see them again and that makes them fall madly and deeply in love with me. Or, I find someone that is about 2% more ferocious than I am and they can’t help but make me fall madly and deeply in love with them.

Because, I want to get this love thing right. And, if that means I need to act like a fool a few more times, then so be it.

Love is far more important than pride, right?

RIGHT!?

All You Need Blogger: Jamie Varon

Jamie blogs about far too personal topics and has a desire to make a lot of blogs look really pretty. She likes traveling, hot chocolate, typography, and the occasional (ok, FREQUENT) glass of white wine. Also, she has an uncanny ability to wear dresses almost every single day, no matter what the weather. It’s a skill, truly, it is.  Follow her on Twitter @jamievaron

Song: Kate Nash – The Nicest Thing

Did you know I have a private newsletter that goes out ONLY to subscribers? It offers stories of travel adventures, writing brilliance, links to great content around the internet and other crazy shaningans.

Subscribe to Writing on the Webb to Receive Exclusive Updates