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Making Out Time

22 June 2010 9 Comments

I learned from a year of continuously practicing and performing that there are 525,600 minutes in one year of life (I spent approximately 300,000 of those minutes with the song stuck in my head during my senior year.)

It certainly sounds like a lot of time.  There are three digits on EACH side of the comma!  Even if you get 8 hours of sleep a night that only takes 175,200 minutes out.

So now we’re down to 350,400 (see, that’s still three digits on each side of the comma.)

Now let’s assume that at minimum you work 40 hours a week, that only takes out 124,800 minutes.  Still you have 225,600 minutes left to your own devices.  Over 618 minutes a day.

And yet we are constantly making excuses for why we can’t do things.  Saying that there just isn’t enough time in the day.  Running ourselves ragged to accomplish far too many little checks in the boxes that fill our to-do lists every day.

We make ourselves slaves to the second hand of the watch counting down our time here on Earth.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Dougal Waters

When I moved to my new 9-5 gig in the Corporate office I left the start-up I had been at from the day the door opened and also one of my closest friends.  I was going from spending 124,800 minutes a week (give or take for meetings and vacation days) hanging out with her to not even talking to her some weeks.

And when I met my “touching down” friend soulmate (you know…that person you meet for tea one afternoon in the cold winter of Maine and immediately become inseparable from?!) I knew that her summers were crazy but I had no idea how crazy my spring and summer were going to be.

Not being able to spend time with them KILLED a small piece of me.

So now my former boss and I do forty-five of yoga every Wednesday night so that we exercise not only our bodies but our minds cause we are both kind of  (very) stressed and need to stretch and relax our minds.  We *may* follow up the yoga session with a delicious dinner and a bottle of wine.  I have the appointment scheduled in my work calendar in bright red, an appointment no one can schedule over.

And recently my kindred-third decader and I realized that there was no way we’d be able to have the quality one-on-one conversations we’d come to love if we didn’t make time for it.  So 6 AM every Tuesday we are out walking around Back Bay on the 3.5 mile Boulevard.  60-90 minutes of pure conversation, laughter, and bonding.  Plus she’s effing adorable and makes me fruit smoothies to take to work every morning after I get ready at her digs intown Portland.

You can tell the things that are important to you by carefully looking at what you make time for in your minutes.

If you aren’t spending those 525,600 minutes doing the things that further the happiness that exists in your heart and soul, well…what are you REALLY doing here on Earth?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=110IA6Osx5Q&feature=related

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  • http://doniree.com Doniree

    I LOVE THIS. And I want to make appointments like that with some close friends because far too often, I let those go in favor of all of these THINGS I think I have to do. AH, this hit at just the right time.
    Doniree´s last [type] ..Gamay, Drivers, and Champagne

    • http://www.opheliaswebb.com Elisa Doucette

      Doni – I highly recommend it! Otherwise I find it far too “easy” to let days and weeks and eventually months slip by without spending the quality time with the people that I want to spend.

      But you are so right…often we prioritize the things we convince ourselves that we HAVE to do but in reality they could PROBABLY shift in time management. Enjoy the time with those close to you, it’s so important in the mental/emotional health category!

  • http://lifeaftercollege.org Jenny Blake

    Okay, so forgive me – but at first I thought this post was literally “Making Out Time!” – like seven minutes in heaven or spin the bottle or any of those ridiculous games I played in middle school and high school where we had designated kissing time. Side note: I could use a little more of that in life!

    Back to the real point: it’s so profound to think of life in minutes, especially given how much we can do in just a few short ones. This really got me thinking about how I fill my day at a micro-level (rather than just thinking about the big chunks of time for gym, work, and sleep).

    Hopefully we will get to slumber party for many, many more minutes – can’t think of a better way to spend them :D
    Jenny Blake´s last [type] ..Success Demons…and a Signed Contract

    • http://www.opheliaswebb.com Elisa Doucette

      Jenny Blake – I realized after it hit the feed that it was probably mis-titled. Well, I realized after someone else brought up that making out was their favorite pass time. :)

      I have to say that one of the things that song DID give me was the idea that all those minutes of life add up to a big chunk but the tiny ones are more manageable. Like the cell of an Excel worksheet or the lines of a Google Doc itinerary.

      And yes, our slumber parties are another carving out of minutes I demand in my week. Even if it’s just 20 or 60 or 200…chatting with you makes my week complete-r.

      Here are the full lyrics…which break it out even more:

      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Six hundred minutes,
      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Moments so dear.
      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Six hundred minutes
      How do you measure, measure a year?

      In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights
      In cups of coffee
      In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.

      In five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Six hundred minutes
      How do you measure
      A year in the life?

      How about love? Measure in love
      Seasons of love. Seasons of love

      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Six hundred minutes!
      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Journeys to plan.

      Five hundred twenty-five thousand
      Six hundred minutes
      How do you measure the life
      Of a woman or a man?

      In truths that she learned,
      Or in times that he cried.
      In bridges he burned,
      Or the way that she died.

      It’s time now to sing out
      Though the story never ends
      Let’s celebrate, remember a year
      In the life of friends

      Oh you got to got to remember the love!
      You know that love is a gift from up above
      Share love, give love spread love
      Measure measure your life in love.

  • http://diamondkt.blogspot.com David

    This was a rather timely post (no pun intended). The reason I say that is yesterday I made some time to do exactly what you just suggested – make time for someone else. Time I really didn’t have, but time I needed to find. So I took work off and jumped in the car for a 2 hour roadtrip to spend the day with my 90-year-old Grandma. Who by the way has a full calendar herself! Seriously, it took her 2 weeks just to pencil me in around all her Bridge games with the girls, volunteering days, etc.

    The real kicker – one of the first things she said to me when I came in the door is that after 90 years of living, the one thing she hates more than anything is to see anyone waste their life, to waste that precious time. How everyone should live to their fullest, find their passion, surround them with people they love, be the happiest they can be, etc. There’s more to that, but I’ll save those life lessons and wise words for a blog post of my own in the near future. ;)

    And while yesterday I felt at ease being unplugged, today I return to work and feel anxiety over everything digital! I constantly feel overwhelmed, stressed and wondering where my time is? A vacation to a remote island is probably long overdue. So while we should always do our best to make time for others, I think it’s equally important that we make time for ourselves as well. All easier said than done though.

    Do you remember “leap second” back in 2006? It’s when an extra second was added on to the year. I wrote a post about it back then that you might like…

    1/19/06 – 1 Second Added To Your Life, What Will You Do With It?
    http://diamondkt.blogspot.com/2006/01/1-second-added-to-your-life-what-will.html
    David´s last [type] ..The Quarter-Life Crisis Doesn’t Exist For Dudes

    • http://www.opheliaswebb.com Elisa Doucette

      David – That is the one downside to carving out time like that. The moments you carve out are wonderful and fun and mean so much. And in those moments you realize that there’s no place else you should or would rather be. But once you get back to your other “obligations” you get overwhelmed and stressed. And it almost convinces you that you should never have taken that time.

      I used to think like that…thinking that I made a bad choice by prioritizing my friendships and relationships first. But as your Grandma noted, at the end of our lives will we look back and remember all the extra hours we worked and all the running around we did fondly or will it be the times with people who mattered.

      And yes, I remember your extra-second post from my #BlogCrush research. Very similar ideas…

  • http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/ Ryan Stephens

    I’m guilty of getting frustrated with people when I hear the “I’ve just been so busy,” when the truth is we’re all really busy. The truth is they have just have other priorities taking precedence or they’re bad at managing their time. For me, my workout/runs take priority during the work week, and then I need an hour to unplug before bed. I try to call my parents and/or friends when I’m driving home from work because when you work 12 hour days 5 days a week that’s when you have time. The people that work 8 hour days Mon-Fri have less excuse :)
    Ryan Stephens´s last [type] ..The Silver Lining

    • http://www.opheliaswebb.com Elisa Doucette

      UGH!!! That is one of my BIGGEST pet peeves. When people look at me and say “Sorry, I’m too busy.” Or even better, blow me off and AFTERWARDS claim busy schedules as a reason for such behavior. I wrote awhile ago for Brazen, I think “I don’t have time” is a poor excuse for saying “This isn’t important enough for me to MAKE time.”

      As for the 9-5ers, I agree to a point…but I also figure that when you are so loathing of your job that your computer is shut down 2 minutes before you are scheduled to hit the pavement then the soul sucking unhappiness you experience is probably a bigger drain of mental/emotional health than missing time with friends could ever be.

      Not that we’ve ever experienced that though, right?! :)

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