Brutally Single On Valentine’s Day
Guest Post by All You Need Contributor Alexandra Munier
I’m single. Brutally single. Single for the first time 10 ten years, still bobbing in the wake of losing my condo, most of my furniture, and my life as a person who doesn’t sleep alone. And sure, there are parts of me that are hopeful for the future, and there are parts of me that are excited by the prospect of meeting someone new, but there are also parts of me that are realistic about the fact that being suddenly single kind of sucks. Sometimes (when even my dog would rather sleep on the floor, and it’s 50 degrees in my room and no one to huddle with for warmth), it REALLY SUCKS.
With Valentine’s Day swiftly approaching, one might think that a person mired in this level of single suckage would be getting a month long supply of Snickers bars and heading down into the fallout shelter until she was well clear of the Leap Year.
But no! Actually, Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday, and it has been since I was young enough to sleep in a twin bed and not be at all concerned that it was only really built for one.
Sure, I’ve heard all the excuses about how annoying Valentine’s Day is for people who aren’t in relationships. I’ve heard the various complaints about over-commercialization, and how it’s just a cheap ploy for greeting card and chocolate vendors to steal our hard earned dollars. But I see both of those issues as the problems of the disgruntled masses, not implicit in the holiday itself.
Ignore the archaic religious in origin! Valentine’s Day in the modern age supposed to mean LOVE. And I don’t understand how anyone could possibly argue with that.
The real problem is reminding the disgruntled masses that love doesn’t mean diamond necklaces, surf & turf, or sexual favors. Hallmark doesn’t have a patent on love, and there is no federal Valentine’s Day mandate demanding that you must buy the biggest box of heart shaped candy that you can afford. In fact, you don’t have to buy any candy at all if you don’t want.
So, let’s take it back to grade school. Before the complications of romantic love and the terrifying prospect of being Forever Alone haunted our nightmares. Remember making Valentines for every kid in your class? Remember pasting glitter and macaroni to crude heart shaped construction paper cut outs for mom and dad? Giggling your way through a bag of conversation hearts?
I’m not recommending that you cancel your dinner dates and shun your significant others until the 14th is safely past. I’m just suggesting that we begin to utilize Valentine’s Day as a day to celebrate all kinds of love. Love for friends, and family, pets, coworkers, neighbors, boyfriends, girlfriends, wives, husbands, mistresses, lovers, crushes, and cute strangers that we see on the bus. Love for favorite foods, favorite books, favorite songs, and favorite crappy movies that are always playing on USA and TBS.
Whether you do it with rose petals, or skywriting, or sticky notes, or just plain words. Whether you do it with a grand gesture or a tiny secret note. Steal some minutes on Tuesday to tell people that you appreciate them, that you’re glad they’re around, that they’re brilliant, and beautiful, and special, and fun. Stow your bitterness and snark in the overhead compartment until the plane has safely landed on the 15th, and spend the day being in love with LOVE. Because if there’s one thing that’s always worth celebrating, I’m pretty sure this is it.
All You Need Contributor: Alexandra Munier
Alexandra Munier writes a blog called Broke207. It used to be about being young and poor in the State of Maine. But then things go complicated and now it’s more about being young, single, and starting over. At least she’s still in Maine. And apparently people still read it, because she was just nominated for Best Blog in the Portland Phoenix Best of 2012 Poll. Maybe you should vote for her.
Song: Inches and Falling by The Format
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