Do you ever read through a book or watch a movie and think “I wish I could do that?”

Unfortunately no amount of wishing or hoping will ever allow us the ability to absorb super powers or find ourselves walking onto a starting rotation with the Chicago Cubs as a twelve-year old.

That doesn’t mean that the stories and plots and characters are a completely impossible daydream.  In fact, long before they were chapters engaging you in thought and blockbusters riveting you to the screen, they were merely ideas lingering in the back of someone’s mind.

Why then, do we live our lives vicariously through these fictional manifestations?

What stops us from being the authors of our own lives?

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Stockbyte

In college, majoring in creative writing, I spent semesters learning how to tell other people’s stories.  Plotting the nuances of character and setting, analyzing the beginning/middle/end, creating entire worlds for other people yet continuing to let my own world create me.

Watching the plot unfold and somehow feeling helpless against the turning of my own pages.  Living a life of re-action rather than pro-action.  Letting someone else tell my story.

That is when I began to apply some of the same strategies I had learned in creative writing to my own life.  Visualizing how I wanted scenes to unfold.  Storyboarding my future dreams and ambitions.  Creating the characters I wanted to be part of my life and seeking them out.

And as soon as I started applying these techniques and ideas, I started feeling like my life was my own.  And being belligerently happy with what I was forming.  Taking calculated risks, falling on my face a lot, but getting right back up knowing that my readers would always be cheering me on.

The hero and heroine of a great story are imperfect, tangible and beautiful disasters that you still want to win.  So I ask you…

Who wants to live a life that is irresistibly engaging?

Want to learn more about Being The Author Of Your Own Life?  Want to escape for 3-days to a lakeside retreat in scenic Maine, pictures straight out of the LL Bean catalog?  Want to “come home” and learn more about the person you yearn to be?

Then join me at Kingsley Pines where I will be on the Homecoming Retreat team leading one of the circles on Saturday morning.  The entire weekend (lodging, food, circles/sessions, yoga/dancing & much more)  for two nights is only $495.

Register today because space is very limited and going very quickly!

And make sure to check back to my site in 2011 (and in the interim, of course!)  for more on Being The Author Of Your Own Life.

 I am near obsessed with Post-It Notes.

Seriously.  They are quite possibly my favorite office supply (if one is able to have an actual “favorite office supply?!)

Post-It Notes, for those of you living deep within the caverns of the Earth under rocks, are little 3″ x 3″ squares that have a thin slightly adhesive film along the back that allow you to jot clarifying details and leave little reminders for yourself.

Post-It Notes are only a small piece, but as the mission of the Operation Beautiful states, it really IS that simple.  All you need is a piece of paper and a pen.

The project started simply enough for Caitlin Boyle.  After too many years of being “her own worst enemy” Caitlin decided that things needed to change.  In her teens she used pain to release the feelings of depression and angst.  In the youngest parts of her adulthood it was ”calorie counting” and mentally berating herself.  A few years later, overwhelmed by stress and anxiousness and general unhappiness, the negativity again reared it’s ugly head.  

It all caused her to dislike and even hate parts of herself that she couldn’t see in the mirror.

I too, suffer from an impossible quest for perfection.  And I too, have used all the techniques Caitlin did (and some others) in an attempt to punish myself for never being able to attain it.  I carry the scars on my arms as constant reminders that my best never seemed to be good enough.  That, in my mind, boys didn’t flirt with me or want to be in relationships with me because I wasn’t pretty and skinny and worthwhile.   That I was always the frumpy throwaway sidekick to my beautiful and accomplished girl-friends, and didn’t deserve anything better for myself.

It isn’t about how you look when you peer in a mirror or judge yourself against the magazine images.  The project is NOT a call to action for feminism or girl power or cause-activism.  As I read through Caitlin’s published manifestation of Operation Beautiful, I was overwhelmed with the message the book had to share:

Operation Beautiful is about who you are as a person.  It is about celebrating your unique personality, loving yourself fully, and letting go of any negativity that weighs you down…Operation Beautiful is about one simple truth: You are beautiful…just the way you are!

Each chapter (Fat Talk, Family and Friends, Fitness, Food, Faith, and Going Forward) contains not only pieces of advice and Caitlin’s thoughts on the subject, but also Post-It notes and shared thoughts from readers across the globe.  Operation Beautiful started because one day, as Caitlin Boyle stood in front of a mirror in a public restroom, she realized that there were probably other people in the world who needed to hear one very important message: “YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!“  She knew, because it was the mantra she had been desperately seeking for herself.

Since that day, Operation Beautiful has been a movement that has spread globally.  A way for people to encourage others by paying-it-foward and leaving their own messages to be found in public location.  But like so many things, by doing something to uplift others, the messages are just as important to the person leaving them as the person finding them.

Contest Announcement!

I asked the folks at Gotham Books if they would also send me a second copy of Operation Beautiful to give to a lucky reader and they were more than happy to oblige!  The contest will run through 5 PM on August 31st (at which point I will select a comment to win via Random.org) and the rules are pretty simple: 

Leave a comment below with a short note (the length you’d be able to fit on a Post-It) that you wish you could leave on someone’s mirror. 

Basically, an affirmation or positive thought that you wish someone (in particular) would realize in themselves, because you see it so crystal clear.  You don’t need to say WHO you are writing the affirmation for, just the note itself. 

And maybe, if you are so compelled, share the note with them as well. 

We all need more beautiful in our lives, so why not start with a Post-It?!

I fell asleep on my couch last night.

I slept right through one of my besties calling, texting, DMing & emailing me in the span of about 3 minutes (according to my phone logs) to let me know that she had spotted me on Missed Connections after my column ran yesterday morning.

You are now reading this thinking “Whatever, people fall asleep on their couches all the time.  That’s not exactly a big deal.”

The big deal however, is that I fell asleep sometime around 6:30 PM.

As I’m getting ready to transition from full-time paid supported by the love and bi-weekly paycheck of my beautiful corporate existence to the fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants, learn-to-love-rice-and-canned-bean-meals, people-take-pity-on-me-and-buy-me-coffee-occasionally existence of a freelance writer and public relations consultant/strategist/girl-Friday/chick-about-town/Can-you-tell-I’m-still-looking-for-a-decent-job-title?!, I’m essentially running myself ragged.

Working 40+ hours, trying to balance a good 60% client load, not completely neglecting my friends and family, meeting obligations, setting up viewings of apartments to move, meeting with my officemate to figure out shared workspace, meeting people at 9:30 to watch movies and nod off on their shoulder, finding time to eat at least twice a day, remembering to brush my teeth before stumbling into bed…and trying to fit that all into this pesky 24 hours in a day schedule that some idiot came up with a few hundred years ago.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Laurence Monneret

I keep coaxing myself out of fits of anxiety and panic at the “WTF AM I DOING”-ness of my decision by going over my schedule again and again in my mind and thinking how much things will change on September 1st when I free up 40+ hours of work.  But in reality come September 1st my time will be even more consumed.  Sure, the 40+hours will be spent working on the stuff I *need* to work on, but it isn’t like it will get easier.  Owning a business isn’t exactly easy.

The most important trait of an entrepreneur is energy.  The ability to dig deep within yourself and find another hour to finish a story.  The time to get to the post office to mail a present to a friend that’s been sitting in your living room for a month.  The fortitude to drag yourself to a client’s office and sit down with them to review contracts and pick up the deposit.  Energy to carry yourself through the day when you aren’t sure where you are coming from and where you are going.

And me?  I fall asleep on the couch at 6:30 at night.  It’s one of my biggest fears.  That I will exhaust myself.  And have a flare-up.  And not fall asleep at 6:30 PM but instead be stuck in bed for days straight and unable to move because of the searing pain pulsing through my body.

If I do one thing while starting this business, it’s going to have to be taking time to rest.  I know this.  I know I am not a fount of unlimited energy.  My body just will not allow it.  Unfortunately my rest time is currently coming at the expense of my friends.  To them, I am so sorry. I miss them all so much.  I’d be lost if I did not have Facebook and Twitter and other online ways to stalk their lives quickly.

But I promise, one day I’ll come out of this fog.

I don’t expect you to be there.

But I would certainly love it if you were.

This post is partially inspired by this fantastic new E-Book that came out yesterday, If I Would Have Known Just One Thing, book concept by Shane Mac. It’s 30 one-page submissions by great leaders and minds from around the web, asking what one thing they wish they knew “then” that they know “now.”  A few of my favorites include: Give Your All, But Relax by Andrew Swenson; Work For Free by Ben Eubanks; Friends In High Places by Mark W. Schaefer; Don’t Wait by Jenny Blake; Commitment To The Process by Patrick Antrim; Play To Your Strengths by Mike McDerment & Success Is: Collaborate, Collaborate, Collaborate! by Tony Deblauwe.  Check it out today…you won’t be disappointed!

Tears are a funny thing.

We cry when we are happy.  We cry when we are sad.   We cry when we get something in our eyes and we cry when there’s some sort of eyeball trauma.

Scientifically, we shed tears to release hormones which build up during intense times of stress.   Thursday and Friday were days filled with happy and sad tears, and everything in between for me.

My friend, Jayson Nichols, passed away on August 7, 2010 after a valiant and hard-fought battle with brain cancer.  As if I didn’t effing hate cancer enough, this pretty much put me over the edge.  He was only 31 years old.

I met Jay through his brother, an extremely good friend of mine (and one of “my boys“) and some would observe that Jay was not a “close friend” of mine.  I mean, if he passed me on the street he would stop and hug me and see how I was and all, but we didn’t speak weekly or anything.

But that’s just the kind of person Jay was.  He met me once and immediately added me on Facebook.  He was crazy and goofy, making people laugh and putting them at ease.  He would talk to the shyest person in a room to bring them out of their shell, and for his friends and family he was one of those people that truly would have given you the shirt of his back.  He also had this belief that people were generally faking it – announcing at our last Relay for Life event that we’d all feel silly when he finally admitted “he was faking this cancer thing the whole time.”

And it sucks that he is gone.  Because the world needs more people like Jayson Nichols in it. Last week, we wept at opportune and inopportune moments, grieving our loss.  Capturing moments in our day to fixate on the empty spaces where he used to sit and chat.   Where he used to lay when he was too tired from chemo.  Where we were when we first learned of his diagnosis.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Lesley Magno

At his funeral, between silent heaving sobs (I don’t really like people seeing me cry, being vulnerable like that) I listened to the memories everyone had and the messages that were passed on.  They quoted from The Book of Ecclesiastes, reminding us that there is a season and time for everything.

That for every moment of happiness and laughter there is also a time for sadness and tears.

That for every time remembered, there is a searing pain for memories that will never be.

That for friend that has been lost, there is another friend who is gained.*

Tears happen, whether we are mourning at funerals or bursting at weddings.

It’s all a part of the beautiful balance of life.   And the living of that life is comprised of how we react to the things that happen around us.  We can choose to dwell in the pain or we can strive to cling to the sun.

Jay reminded us that we can grieve the fact that his life was cut far too short, or we can rejoice in the wonderful life he had.

Life is about those moments.  Those fleeting times that flash before our eyes, that we miss because we are focusing too much on what is to come.  Our futures are never guaranteed.  You cannot know what is going to happen.  We only have the moments of now.   Hysterical laughter with friends playing soccer and “tackle” in the yard with kids.  The way a lover’s hand feels as they caress your face and look into your eyes.  The feeling of pride that swells with a job well done.

The tears you cry remembering a friend with whom you will have no more of these memories.

And the smiles that creep onto your face, remembering the memories you get to keep.

I promise Jay, we’ll Never Quit.  Enjoy the Sox games.  You’ve gotta have a pretty sweet view!

* Stef & Karen I’m talking to you – you girls better come up from Boston to visit us lots!!!

Lots of companies SAY they want to be pro-women and “Girl Power” and all, but the truth is that they want women to THINK that they are all pro and power and whatnot, but they never ACTUALLY do anything about it.

Magazines still use the same stick thin models for their fashion spread even though the article directly proceeding states that they think all women should love themselves regardless of their size.  Tabloids tout the “fat actress” who has *gasp* slipped dangerously into Size 8 territory.  Online dating sites have statistically lower click-thrus of women who are Average or A Few Extra Pounds or Looks Like The Majority Of Women.

Now while I fully admit that Americans (especially) have a serious problem with over-weightness (is that even a word?!) I also think we have a problem in the opposite direction.  The funny thing is that most women are never going to look like 5% of the population.  They just genetically can’t swing it.

So I’m always encourage by campaigns like Dove’s Campaign for Real Beauty.  Or studies of thousands of people investigating the age women are most beautiful (hint – it isn’t 21!)

And this “most recent ad” by Nike empowering women to revel in their best feature.  A nice big round butt.  Sir Mix-A-Lot would be so proud.  But the interesting thing is that this isn’t a new campaign by Nike.  They ran the same campaign in 2005 with a valiant grassroots support but not enough to continue the campaign.

I personally am a bigger fan of the simple and more minimalistic ad.

But in 2005 it was all about the colors and snazz and…well…the butt!

So which one do you like better?  And what do you think of Nike’s “re-campaign” overall?

*** Just as a special treat for all you blog readers, check out this awesome cover of Baby Got Back by Jonathan Coulton.  I pinkie-swear promise you will not be disappointed!!

I update The Webb on far too few Tuesdays with a little ditty about my most recent #blogcrush – a blog that I follow frequently and find inspiration, laughter and deep thoughts from. You know who they are, those bloggers that you’ve never even met but you feel a strange connection…you almost have a little crush on them? These are most definitely folks on my blog roll, and if you are reading and subscribing to The Webb they should be on yours, too.

I learned about this week’s #blogcrush because just about everyone in my little blogosphere-y circle of friends essentially worships her as a hilarious, brazen, sassy, opinionated, genuine, amazing young woman and I was totally out of the loop for not following her.  I’ll admit, being the sometimes shy and often straight-laced girl that I am, my first few times reading her blog I was torn between slight blushing horror and virtual roll-on-the-floor laugh-out-loud giggles.  But that’s just one of the awesome things about Nicole Antoinette, and her blog More Is Better.   After I met her and got to know her EXTREMELY well during my visit to San Francisco (let’s just say she and I were locked in a bathroom for a few hours and Nicole was most certainly not wearing pants* for most of the time) I can guarantee that much like her blog, with Nicole there is so much more than meets the eye.

If you want just a small shot-sized dose of Nicole’s humor (she is frequently referred to as an online personal humor essayist) you really need look no further than her About Me section labeled “The Girl.”  First of all, I have the utmost respect for any girl who will not only refer to the boy she’s seeing as James Bond, but also finger crossie promises things to him via About Me page.  Second of all her Life List is one of my favorites, as it includes lots of different stuff from milking a cow and going canoeing to “”Get photographed naked for TimeOut NY’s Naked New Yorker Photo Shoot” and ride in a submarine.  Plus she has a mad girl-crush on Chelsea Handler who is easily in my Top 3 list of celebrity girl crushes as well, so it only makes sense that if she gets to drink vodka with Chelsea then I am TOTALLY there, too.  Third of all, she runs an amazing website design/development company with her roommate/BFF/heterosexual lifemate/former #BlogCrush called Shatterboxx Media which basically works to make the internet a prettier place (truly, her site is a great example of their beautification!)  Fourth of all she writes for a bunch of other cool places AND she introduced me, via her internship, to The Bloggess who is another person I had no knowledge of because I pretty much lived under a rock.

But her blog is right – More Is [Definitely] Better.  So when she writes about her shenanigans like finding wine glasses on Amazon that will fit an entire bottle of wine and maybe kinda sorta not knowing EXACTLY where Alaska is geographically I am completely drawn in to the way she makes the most simple things seem like the greatest stuff ever.   A rarity in much of blogging, she shares so much of herself online and does it well.  Whether she’s writing about being single and internet stalking potential dates or the penultimate awkward conversation with a boy you really really really ridiculously like about your blog and his place in it, she is engaging and raw and funny as all hell.  This is a skill I have rarely seen executed so well in blogging.

And this week, when Nicole managed to intermingle ALL OF THAT AMAZINGNESS with one of the most beautifully raw posts about falling for someone and finding out what matters, I wanted to jump up and down screaming at the top of my lungs to everyone I knew about it’s awesomeness.  If you click NOTHING ELSE in this #BlogCrush, click the link for this post.  I read it and tears actually formed in my eyes.  I heart it THAT MUCH!  Just to give you a little taste:

Thing one is that you really don’t know how deeply you’re in the hole of I’m-unlimited-crazy-about-him until you look up and see that ground level is thundering light-years above your head.

So if you are looking for a hilarious (seriously HILARIOUS) and frank and deliciously vulgar take on the ups and downs and all-arounds of figuring out your 20′s and making two-buck-chuck look classy, make sure to add More Is Better to your feeds.

Who is your #BlogCrush in the blogosphere? Make sure to update it on your blog with your own! Wanna learn how #BlogCrush works? Check out the guide and FAQ’s.

* Figured that would get your attention – The plumbing in James Bond’s apartment backed up at the post-post-Tweet Up event and we diligently cleaned it up AFTER she went searching in San Francisco at 3 AM for paper towels and a plunger.  Do you know how hard it is to find a plunger in San Franciso at 3 AM?!

I love pesto.

Like, seriously, I should probably be psychologically evaluated for my obsession with this condiment (is it a condiment? I assume it is. I mean, it’s usually USED that way…)  If I see it listed as part of a recipe for an item at a restaurant, regardless of the other ingredients, that particular item just shot up to Top 3 picks for me. 

And then I love cheese.  But really…who doesn’t love cheese?

And finally I love toasty bread.  Sure, a regular store-bought loaf of Country Kitchen will do all right, but I’m talking rough-cut multi-grain yummy homemade loaf of bread. 

Do you see what all these things have in common? 

Yeah, I didn’t either til my colleague and I were faced with a dilemma while wandering around Portland Arts District during a lunch break at a conference.  And that dilemma was simply…where should we go to eat?  We decided on a Thai place at the intersection of Congress and State Street, which was closed even though their hours said they were open.  

I’ll admit, I was bitter. 

But we trudged back towards the Eastland Park Hotel, peering in windows to see what might be open.  It was during this new quest for sustenance that we stumbled on Local Sprouts Cafe, which is quite possibly the coolest little place I’ve found in Portland in awhile.  For real.  Like, when the Way Below Status Quo roadtrip came to Portland I lured them with talk of the wonderful meal I had there. 

As I stared at their handwritten chalkboard of delicious locally-grown organic yumminess I was overwhelmed by possibilities.  But like any good social media passionista would, I was scouring the menu while duly loading my Foursquare app to “check-in.”  And as I pulled up the venue I noticed 2 or 3 tips, all about the same thing. 

Try the grilled cheese and pesto sandwich

Friends, I tell you.  If you are visiting Portland, Maine and want something to eat then please run DO NOT WALK to Local Sprouts Cafe for this amazingness to thrill your tastebuds.  And while it intrigued me on the chalkboard menu I had *no idea* of the deliciousness I would experience.

I heard once in a marketing/sales class that a satisfied/happy customer will tell four of their friends about a good experience but a dissatisfied/unhappy customer will tell eleven.  When I meet small businesses to talk to them about their social media strategy, they are certainly worried about the unhappy customers and their eleven (or, thanks to Facebook and Twitter and MySpace and LinkedIn and and AND it is more like their eleven HUNDRED) friends.  But they don’t always realize the power that lies in happy customers.  They are willing to share with their friends, but instead of four by using social media they are reaching ELEVEN HUNDRED people in their networks alone.

With programs like Foursquare, and folks like me (there are more coming…I’m what you might call a “Mid-Adopter” or “Cool Before Cool Was COOL Adopter”) then your venue can reach ANYONE trying to determine why they should go to your establishment over someone else’s.  Or looking for the best deals and best meals.   Giving them a reason to sing your praises and appreciating those who do. 

And if you are a business or know a business staring at the computer screen at that little cartoony figure bounce a playground ball and scratching their heads I highly suggest they check out Foursquare Perspectives (from Awareness, Inc.)  It’s a little marketing hubpage that not only has some great E-Books on The State of Foursquare and leveraging Foursqaure, but it will also let you search through Fourquare’s extensive information store to find out the critical details needed to determine ROI for the site.  In it’s simplest terms, it proves the value of this medium for the future of geolocation based social media.

But most importantly you should all know once I move to my workspace in the West End only two blocks from this cafe in September, I’m going to start working on mayorship of Local Sprouts.  So be on the lookout. 

Yeah, I’m talking to you @FranklinMcMahon. 

I update The Webb on far too few Tuesdays with a little ditty about my most recent #blogcrush – a blog that I follow frequently and find inspiration, laughter and deep thoughts from. You know who they are, those bloggers that you’ve never even met but you feel a strange connection…you almost have a little crush on them? These are most definitely folks on my blog roll, and if you are reading and subscribing to The Webb they should be on yours, too.

I learned about this week’s #blogcrush when I was out visiting another #blogcrush in San Francisco this April.  While sipping margarita’s at Tres Agaves during a Tweet-Up, I was introduced to Lauren Friedman who writes The Off-Beat Report.  Lauren was so sweet and nice, gushing “I follow you on Twitter. You’re opheliaswebb!  I’m Lauren_Hannah.”  To which I essentially had respond “Yeah, apparently I’m kind of a beotch, I don’t know if I follow you.”  Silly rabbit, I have no idea why the heck I wasn’t following her.  We spent the night laughing and bonding and programming our cell phone numbers into each others phones like any good crush-worthy person would.  Within a week of returning from my trip she posted “Apparently, I’m a Control Freak.”  And I knew I was hooked.

Lauren really strikes me as one of the best modern day “renaissance women.”  Aside from writing about topics from happiness to social media to sex, she also finds time to update two other sites AND kick ass for far too many hours a week as a Community Genius.  No, seriously, that’s her job at an awesome social marketing company in SF called Context Optional (if you watch the scrolling pics at the bottom you’ll catch a glimpse of Ms. Lauren and her great co-workers – doesn’t that look like a fun place to work?!)  A woman after my own heart who “wear[s] the highest heels, fall[s] in love really fast and [is] a workaholic. [She goes] to extremes.”  Additionally her About page reveals that she “[is] impatient, worr[ies] too much, wear[s] her heart on her sleeve, question[s] everything and dip[s] her toes in too many puddles for her feet to stay grounded.”  Her constantly updating photo album is a great glimpse into the days and nights of a working girl in San Francisco.

Speaking of getting a glimpse into the life of someone, I’ve recently become near obsessed with Lauren’s Lifecast, a constantly updating site of snippets of her life in multi-media form.  Sort of like a scrapbook meets a Moleskine meets Twitter meets SO MUCH AWESOMENESS I WANT ONE NOW!!  It’s like I finally understand the point of a Tumblr account.  I know, it’s getting overwhelming with all the amazingness this girl puts out BUT I’M STILL NOT FINISHED.

Even if she didn’t have any of this other stuff her posts could easily stand on her own.  Aside from the fact that she has written one of the most useful reviews of Eat, Pray, Love that I’ve found online (I swear ladies, I keep trying to like that book and finish it!) she also has put out some of the most poignant, best friendship, young professional single girl content in my blogosphere.

So if you are looking for a sometimes hilarious/sometimes provacative/sometimes techies/always awesome blog to get photos, videos, blog posts and much more, make sure to add The Off Beat Report to your feeds.

Who is your #BlogCrush in the blogosphere? Make sure to update it on your blog with your own! Wanna learn how #BlogCrush works? Check out the guide and FAQ’s.

Remember that time I quit my job to become a full-time freelance writer?

I do, cause it was just last week.

I even made sure to wear an outfit I’d remember (dress from SF shopping adventure, killer black heels and a turquoise and silver necklace from my former boss/close friend/mentor extraordinaire who totally taught me about believing in myself.)  I wanted the day to be special because it’s something I’ve been planning in my head for about 18 months.

That’s right, I’m not a jumper or a leaper.  Not someone who can in 6 months decide to say “forget it all” and get on a plane to become location independent for a year.  Those people are awesome but I’m just not that hip.  So for those of you who are now choking on your coffee/tea/water/frosty beverage at this bombshell I’ve dropped, please know that this was not a hasty decision.

Nor was it a decision like so many others write about.  I didn’t hate my Corporate America job.  I actually liked MANY parts of it.   I didn’t need to get out now before I went Office Space and burned down the  whole place over some misplaced percentages of pennies and a red Swingline stapler.

Sure there was stuff I didn’t like and things I loathed doing, but I don’t live in an idyllic chamber where I think consulting and freelance writing is going to be all unicorns and puppy dogs.  The grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side of the fence until you realize that is because it is being treated with toxic and creepy-crawly-yucky chemicals sprayed out of a tank with food coloring added.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Robert Daly

I could go over the entire 18 month course of events that led to this decision, but that would be far lengthier than I intended for this post to be.  If you want the story we should meet up for drinks or email or Skype or something to chat it out.

Basically there were 3 very key factors.

The first was when I started seeing a life coach.  I bartered with her, coaching services for social media consulting (which I still do and will continue to do for awhile to come…you know…to eat more than ramen daily…)  She had recently started her own business so it was interesting to not only explore the option myself but also watch her navigate the waters.   And man, for anyone who doesn’t believe in life/business coaches and wants to make a change, I’m telling you…she kicked my ass around in a way that no friend or colleague could have possibly done.  Without Lael’s supportive challenges and passion for my happiness I probably wouldn’t be as confident and belligerently happy in this decision.  Sure, there are moments I still am overwhelmed by it’s reality and implications and kind of want to puke, but overall I know this is where I need to be.

And so when I went to see her the day I was going to give my notice (July 1st for those of you keeping track) she helped me realize the second shifting factor.  See, I started seeing a boy in May.  I know, I know…awww.  Anyways, with him I didn’t have any of the breaking out hives or freaking out about kisses in public.  He just made me happy.  By him being him and letting me be me.  And I did something I haven’t done in approximately eleven years…I put myself out there to lay myself and my feelings directly in enemy territory, prepared for a strike.  On June 30th (the day I had set in my mind 6 months ago to make a decision free fall leap of faith move) I let things end, quite painfully for me (yes, there were tears and ice cream and copious amounts of wine.)  And while having someone you like so much not like you back or it being just bad timing or whatever sucks, it taught me that putting yourself out there in any capacity elicits a far greater return.  And the sun will still rise the next day, regardless of the decisions of the day before.  And most importantly the smile on my face and giddiness in my chest are well worth the hangover and sugar coma induced.

Which leads me to my third and final BIG MOMENT WOW factor, and that is the Universe.  I was so intrigued by Susan Pogorzelski’s ongoing Twitter conversations with the Universe from the beginning because I am a firm believer in fate/karma/destiny/really stupid luck.  I’m a firmer believer in the conditioning of the human spirit and our ability to react to and work with the fate/karma/destiny/really stupid luck.  And over the past six months the opportunities and doors and various circumstances smacking me in the face and screaming “YOU NEED TO DO THIS” have just gotten to be too much so if the Universe is ready to leap with me and be paid totally in Tootsie Roll reimbursement, I’m in.

These are the catalyst “a-HA” moments that got me here.  Of course I wouldn’t even entertain the notion without the support of my friends and family.  From my friend Sam who told me five years ago when we both worked in sales that she loved my writing and I should do that for a living to my IRLSPBFFE Jenny Blake who sent me the most amazing email outlining why she believed in me so much and why I needed to make this decision the morning of July 1st, from my parents who joined Facebook to keep in touch and read everything I was putting out to my colleagues who are more interested in my latest column than talking about “that boring insurance stuff,” from my sister who dutifully listened to EVERY POST I WROTE IN THE FIRST 8 MONTHS to the Way Below Status Quo crew who ventured to Portland for their Roadtrip Smackdown and gleefully congratulated me on the move.  And all you readers and friends who comment and email and Skype and message and make me happy every time I log on and challenge me to be the best version of myself.

Everyone and everything has fallen into place, playing a part in pushing me to the decisions I’ve made.

Now begins the craziness…I’m so excited to have it happen and thrilled that you will be here for the ride!

There are people that let things happen and there are people that make things happen.

I’ve spent most of my life being the prior.  Which has always been a difficult existence because most people assumed I was the latter.  In reality I’ve been an EXTREMELY lucky person.  That was likable enough that people went out of their way to help me.

And the Universe has been kind and caught me time and time again when I made foolish leaps without any thought or planning.  Even without the enticement of Tootsie Rolls (which I hear it adores!)  And I was left to wonder “why?”

Why does everyone else get to leap and do these fantastic things while I leap and don’t splat but do end up tumbling into the side of the cliff.

It was yesterday morning, as I sat listening to alternative wake-you-up-all-pepped-and-energized music that I realized the difference.  I had spent all those years letting things happen.  But I had done very little to MAKE them happen.

Photo Credit: Getty Images – Tooga

See, there are most definitely things you have to “let happen.”  Those things that are beyond your control.  Those things that will drive you CRAZY if you delude yourself into thinking you should try to change.

But a happy and successful and content and wonderful life isn’t about those things.

It’s about the things in between.  The things we DO have control over.  The reactions we have to them.  The first thought you have in the morning and the last thought you have before going to bed.  The things you ponder and during those long car trips no where and agonize over in the quiet moments when your mind inadvertently wanders to them.

They are the things we make happen.

We can sit and wait for life to happen to us.  To let it guide our path while we float along waiting for that email from a special person or promotion at our job or perfect condo or or or OR!  Like zombies on a march towards

Or we can make the plans, take the time to think, get our equipment and gear all in line and prepare to take the leap.  To scare the bejeezus out of ourselves and to trust ourselves like we never have before and to close our eyes and feel the wind begin to hit our face as we free fall into our futures.

There are people who let things happen and there are people who make things happen.

Which kind of person are you?